THEY that have power to hurt, and will do none,
That do not do the thing they most do show,
Who, moving others, are themselves as stone,
Unmovèd, cold, and to temptation slow,—
They rightly do inherit heaven's graces,
And husband nature's riches from expense;
They are the lords and owners of their faces,
Others, but stewards of their excellence.
The summer's flower is to the summer sweet,
Though to itself it only live and die;
But if that flower with base infection meet,
The basest weed outbraves his dignity:
For sweetest things turn sourest by their deeds;
Lilies that fester smell far worse than weeds.
Thursday, March 03, 2011
Thank You For Loving Me
Being married for a decade somehow makes one too comfortable and too familiar with the other half that sometimes one forgets to appreciate the little things he has done.
When I was still working, I hardly notice the little gestures that Hubz made. Only now when I'm a SAHM do I fully comprehend how much he loves me & the little ones and how many sacrifices he has made.
Seeing that the boys really needs more supervision, Hubz requested for me to stay home instead and to focus on them. Though knowing that reducing to a single income would have a huge imprint on us, he bravely declared that it is after all his duty to provide for us and I am not obliged to do so.
Even when I went to being a SAHM, he knows it was tough on me and he too resigned from a steady income post to driving full-time as it allows for more flexibility. It definitely wasn't easy especially with all the inflation and what-nots increasing. Not only that, I know it saddens him when there where criticisms from his family who felt that he was making a foolish move and who also had misgivings as to whether he resigned voluntarily or was he given the boot.
I am fiercely protective of my loved ones and I am certainly not going to sit back and let anyone misjudge Hubz who has been really selfless all these while.
There's nothing more I'm proud of than the time when Hubz was working at TY. He worked really hard to earn his keep. He received numerous compliment letters and awards during his time there. Silver, Gold EXSA Awards- you name it, he's got it. He was always scoring 100% for his KPI and always in the top percentile for EW sales. Hubz has also received a number of rewards for his achevements from his BM including monetary rewards. So on what basis do you even have the cheek to conclude that he was given the boot? Let me reiterate; Hubz gave up his career for his family, simple as that.
His biggest sacrifice is when he even gave up his sleep in order to revive our previous double income. Hubz has gone back to the workforce full-time and yet he still drives at night after work to supplement the family income. Imagine having only 3 hours of sleep. All this for the family, not himself. That's how much he loves us.
Now, everyday I am thankful to God for blessing me with a wonderful husband. Every night we pray for his well-being and safety. He's not perfect but he has done more for us than anyone could have ever done.
So stop thinking negatively of him. He is still part of your family after all.
I have always been honest to Hubz in whichever way possible. I'm inclined to tell him almost everything right down to the itsy bitsy detail. Therefore right now I am feeling guilty much.
Hubz has been using manual shaver ever since I thought I misplaced the electric shaver charger which was like a month ago. He winces everytime he uses it 'cos of irritation. Then a miracle happened today -_-
Princess was prancing around with Raul's old backpack with the zipper opened. I saw a cord slyly dangling from the pocket. Already feeling a sense of foreboding, I curiously fished out the cord and voila, there was the charger for the shaver!
Damn! Super WTF because.....I just threw away the electric shaver yesterday!!! WHY??? Why o why did you suddenly decide to make an appearance today and not yesterday?? Or best still, don't ever appear? :(
So right now, for the past 10 minutes, I've been in a dilemma. Should I or should I not tell Hubz about the darn charger?? If I don't tell him I'll forever feel guilty and might not be able to face a shaver EVER(ok, I'm over-exaggerating) or I tell him and suffer his wrath before he strangle me (even more exaggerating, but you get the drift).
Thing is, Hubz being Hubz, will never be angry with me. Instead he'll just say, "It's gone already. What to do? I'll just have to use the manual one." And that will make me feel even more like sh*t :(
Then again, regardless of whether I take 1 hour or 1 week to ponder this, ultimately I will still confess to him. Just because I am so honest ;)
I have never felt 'lucky' in my whole 28 years of existence. Why not? 'Cos I've only won a handful of lucky draws and has never found any money/wallets/hps lying around.
The Hubzter on the other hand has a magic touch that somehow enables him to find things in the weirdest of places. How so?
Its a bit cheesy but Hubz was driving when he felt the sudden urge to take a leak. However, when you're at T.Blangah at like 3am, where can you go? Hence he took the liberty to stop at the side of the road to relieve himself. Once done, he was about to go back inside when he thought he saw a $50 note on the kerb.
At 3 in the a.m, he thought he was hallucinating and moved forward for closer inspection. Lo and behold - it really was 50 quid! Now what are the chances??!!
This reinforces my belief that Hubzter is a very lucky man. Furthermore, he's got me as a wifey so isn't that just lucky? :P
Its not easy having to start from scratch but that's life. No matter how hard it is, you still have to go on. Whether its gonna be fulfilling or not ultimately depends on yourself.
I have done it before and I believe I can do it again. Insya'allah.
Facebook has proven to be a source of distraction and also unwanted attention. It was an avenue to voice out my thoughts but it has been misconstrued. Hence I'm now back to basics - blogging.
It's not until a couple of months that 2010 comes to and end but I can confidently say that it has been a very, very tumultuous year. I dare say that it was the worst year of my life.
I am currently nursing a bleeding heart and this hurting heart is going to take a long time to heal TT_TT.
Many thanks to my dearest Hubz who has stood by me all these years and who has also been my pillar of strength <3
I read my earlier post and was amazed by how some things are soo true, even in your dreams..
Well, I actually said that I would die if I were ever to lose my babies and guess what?! I actually dreamt that my Dearest Hubby passed on and that I was so super duper devastated that I hung myself!! Freaking scary I tell you. I remembered in the dream that I was vey shocked at first. Then denial. Then the truth sets in and I just snapped. Haha!
Thankfully all my babies are still here with me; fine & dandy.
I may not be surrounded by riches; but I'm surrounded by my loves.